In her book, Untamed, Glennon Doyle says, "We can do hard things."
It seems like a simple concept right? Granted, my definition of difficult and yours might not be the same but it doesn't matter how we define it. What it is about is how we move through the difficulty.
As a financial coach it is especially important that I also work with a coach. I can't possibly expect people to trust and work with me as a coach if I cannot be vulnerable enough to seek help and coaching from another coach. Jen Moberly Westra, ACC coached me through a topic that was difficult for me.
Ironically, it had to do with💰. A colleague had asked me a question
about compensation. I was so surprised that she asked the question, I didn’t pause and respond with a question (which is what any coach would do).
⏳ After spending some time reflecting on the conversation,
I decided to make it my coaching request with my #lifecoach.
What I discovered through coaching was that the surprise to me was not the actual question of compensation (it's rarely what's on the surface). It was more about #trust. I was surprised by the question because I was still building trust with this
🤔 I had a decision to make. Was I going to guess the intention behind the question? Or was I going to learn what the intention was with the possibility that it could shake up our forming relationship? Knowing what the intention was could also help me build trust
with the colleague, but that was the last possible outcome I could establish in my mind.
I committed to my life coach to reach out to the colleague and have a conversation to be curious, learn more and maybe even share what was behind my surprise within the next week.
The very next day...
📱 I texted my colleague to see if they were available for a call. We talked on the phone. I learned that my colleague has some similar aspirations and that her question was 1) about her own journey
and 2) an effort to make sure I wasn't giving away the farm. (my words).
🛑 Had I not stopped and had what I felt was a #difficult conversation with them I wouldn't be able to 1) understand where they are in their journey, 2) be able to support them and 3) and built trust.
I reported back to my life coach via text "Conversation w/ ____✅ completed."
For you friends, we can indeed do hard things. The more we do the hard things, the easier it becomes. Asking for help by working with a coach will challenge, encourage, and hold us accountable.
I'm so thankful for all the coaches in my life!